I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
just peed on my shirt somehow, im calling it a day
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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