YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Randomize
