She's JV to your varsity
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
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