suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Randomize
