I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize
