It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
