Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
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