Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Im at the hospital with monitors on and a giant green top hat. i blew a 24somethin. Im fucked.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
Can I just keep holy water in the night stand next to the vibrator?
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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