well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
I party with great urgency now.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
dude. I can hear the air.
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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