i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
Having sex with my girlfriend wearing my old Tom Brady jersey on the day he's freed is the closest I'll come to a 3way with Tom
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
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