Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
A 5 day bender that ended with refusing to pay my bar tab before I left the city. I offered to send them a selfie so they knew to never let me back in.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Randomize
