Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
Like. There is beer on the other side of that door and 6 yards in. If he's not back in 20 minutes to let me in, I am using this tree as a battering ram.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
