garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
It's Reggie from Taco Bell, send me a pic.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
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