? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
My life has come down to me literally sitting on an uncrustables trying to defrost it because I’m drunk alone and hungry.
Randomize
