just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
Who would have sex with her? She looks like she shops at baby gap
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I made out with my moms boyfriends son last night. Thanksgiving is gonna be reeeal fun!
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
A bitchslap is in order.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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