am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Randomize
