I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
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