just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
