What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Randomize
