One girl and one boy is just not enough.
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
He was having trouble staying hard then just stopped mid-sex and said "it's overheating" while pointing to his dick.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
