You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
I can't tell whether I'm a) still hungover from two nights ago, b) legitimately sick or c) all of the above... multiple choice was never my forte
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
He suffocated between her tits, but she didn't notice because he still came.
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Randomize
