so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
