Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
My epitaph should read "Margaritas: she never learned"
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
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