It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
you went over to those random dudes and told them you were an ordained minister and would like to bless their food. they laughed and agreed, then you said "now bow your heads in prayer" as soon as they did you grabbed a taco off their tray and bolted out the door.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
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