Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
u woke up and asked who took ur pants off then realized u did n almost cried over not gettin layed
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
Randomize