I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
operation harelip BJ is a go
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
How do I put this... You're dating Ricky from Trailer Park Boys. Stop eye-fucking him and actually listen to what he says for once. He actually said "I self-learned that myself, basically" while rolling a joint. He's worse than your unskilled magician ex that accidentally cut off three of his own fingers
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Randomize
