i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
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