I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
That's when you crack a 10am beer
I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
I just want nice things and good sex
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Randomize
