The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
Randomize
