Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Randomize
