Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
yolo... Doesn't that stand for 'shut the fuck up'?
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
