btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
It's a lube slip n slide down the hallway now. Details later.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
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