so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
I just want a simple guy who likes cats, tattoos, and doing coke off my tits.
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
