But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
you can't get genital warts from dogs can you?
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
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