problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
This guy told us that for a dollar and two cigarettes he'd let Megan stomp on his crotch. We were gonna refuse, but we figured someone had to keep him from passing his stupid genes along.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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