Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I wish i was in the wii world.
why the fuck does my google maps say i'm in punjab?!?!? u think it has to do with like...outsourcing?
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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