whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
Randomize
