please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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