somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
100% truth: never tied someone to a bed using 4 pairs of sweatpants before
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize
