I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
