thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
Randomize
