one two three fourrrrnication!
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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