Having a random hookup so left but love u
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
all i tweeted was "emergency this is not a drill" and he immediately texted me asking if this was a subtle booty call…it was
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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