dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize
