Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
