yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
Randomize
