He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Four minutes until I can fart!
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
I'm still a bit day drunk and decided to go for a run. You may get a snapchat of me vomiting soon
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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