Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Randomize
