i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Great. I will show up in your office wearing only oven mitts later today.
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Randomize
