Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
Best friends brother. Beat that.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
